I was to be in Israel this week, leaving on Memorial Day for a most memorable trip…Oh, it was all planned out…however, this very day that I was to be in the air flying to a land I wanted to see and experience, I am at home due to the plans changing because of this unchartered time. And as I am sitting in my office, affectionately known as the Jesus Room, I heard a clinking and clattering of a shower curtain rod falling and it got me thinking…
Where do you want to be, Lora, when things fall apart?
A few minutes later The Salesman came to the Jesus Room to see what I was doing and in the course of our conversation, we talked about the shower curtain and rod had just fallen down. He notices a bunny heading hopping through the back yard and our conversation trails like the bunny. A holiday at home is not so bad. In fact, I smile.
You know, things do fall apart. Shower curtains and rods fall down, trips that are scheduled with tickets purchased get cancelled, plans that are made get rescheduled, people move, circumstances shift, pandemics happen.
Every morning I head to my Jesus Room first. I find stability and solace there. I find peace. I find hope. I also find instruction and reproof. I find wisdom and knowledge and favor with God and man. I find that it is alright to expose every ache and hole in the fiber of my being with the Lord there. If I feel that I did not say the right thing, I find a filling that evens out my deficiencies. If I did say, or do, the wrong thing, I find forgiveness. I find a perfect GOD that loves me back to Him. I find a feeble heart is the strengthened and encouraged by The King. I know that I am loved.
He heals my brokeness,
He listens to my mess,
and He is the One to Whom I confess.
Oh goodness, I could go on and on about the goodness of GOD; but, I want you to know, I take every thing, person, worry, care, and concern with me to the Jesus Room. After that, I go to the garden. Alone. I had to say it because it reminds me of a song. I carefully open the back door where a mama finch has made her nest on the back door wreath, snap a picture to see what is happening inside the nest and head to my flower garden.
During this season, I’ve intentionally walked and prayed around our property. We are blessed to live in town and have a quiet, almost retreat like piece of property. Picture more the size of a postage stamp verses a fold-out car map though. Has this girl that grew up in the country told you before how glad I am to be living in town? Well, if I haven’t, I love living in town. Me being the people person so enjoys it; but, there is someone in our partnership – mainly my partner, who would love to live in a secluded area. Oh the joys of opposites attracting. We could write a book about the stories of searching for a home.
Now back to my story, as I walk the among the flora and fauna, I think of Jesus going to the garden alone to pray. As I walk among the gardenias, peonies, lambs ear, broomstick, loropetalum, a a growing camellia plant thanks to Fran, and a hydrangea that seems to be taking its sweet, sweet time, I pray.
And, I’ve reconfirmed today, that I want to be with Him when something falls apart. I want to be with Him in my coming, or in my going, or in my staying at home because a trip to Israel was cancelled. I want to be with him when I’m in my Jesus Room, or in the garden, or in an upper room. No matter where I am, I just want to be with Him. I know that He is always with me; but, I want to be with Him.
With is good.
With takes me from the depths of disappointment to dreaming again. With takes me from the trip I wanted to take to enjoying the peonies that are here with me today. With me as I walk in the garden with Him. With me as The Salesman comes to my Jesus Room and we talk about ten different things, or sit and say nothing at all.
I was just telling my Lindsay and Lisa friend that I was so thankful that the Lord changed my course for Scripture Memory this year because I had set my mind to memorizing verses that had to do with the beauty of the Lord and without-a-doubt, He compelled me to shift course to memorize a section of Philippians Four. I have marveled as each verse has come up in line to memorize at the timeliness of each and every one. It has been just what I needed and in His goodness, what am I finishing memorizing right now?
“and the peace of GOD which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7
So though I am not on a plane to Israel today, I have peace. And peonies. He is good, all the time.
